you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
