3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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