My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
