Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
