I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
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