this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
