Little spoons don't ask big questions
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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