Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
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