She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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