The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
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