I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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