I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
