Plan B is the new Plan A
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
