my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
