Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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