Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
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