Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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