This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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