So drunk, too bad you don't want this
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
