Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
