my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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