Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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