she is the kim kardashian of front butts
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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