He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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