WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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