They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
