Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
