the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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