If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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