do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
