Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
