How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
