C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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