R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
