the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
