I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
It's just like the Real World with babies
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Randomize
