I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
