Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
