Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
