YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
