I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
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