Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
