After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
