I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
