craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
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