6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
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