I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
