He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
