I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
