that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
